So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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