Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize