i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
