I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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