Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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