Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
