Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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