Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
whose parrot is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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