You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
