idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
