I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
