i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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