She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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