do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I lost the right to judge tonight
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
