you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
