oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I love having hate sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize