I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
