Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize