sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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