i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
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