Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
