We're like a lot better than the average bears
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
