I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
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