I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
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