Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
