Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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