She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
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Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
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I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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