Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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