in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
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Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
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I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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