no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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