Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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