Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
