I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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