what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
