just come out here and I will go home with you...
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
where does the pee come out of this thing
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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