Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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