I'm lost and stupid without you.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I have aggressive nipples.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
