We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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