One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
