we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Randomize
