So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait