just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Randomize