he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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