Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
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