i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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