The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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