Fuck appropriateness.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I intend to get homeless drunk
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
