yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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