So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
It's rum buckets o'clock
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
