Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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